tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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