Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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