Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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