Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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