All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
