Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
