Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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