If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
