Cold hands, warm shart.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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