Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
