My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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