did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
