Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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