How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize