i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
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