She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
