idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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