There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
