Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
