Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
