Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
