He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize