Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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