Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
