I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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