You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
