I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
