I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
