"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
