one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
this will be a night to untag.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
