i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
