I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
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