Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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