GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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