nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
