Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize