is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
