put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
