And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
We need to get me chipped asap
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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