i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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