you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
