Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
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