Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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