he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
