420 ftw
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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