So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
