Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
