your thong is hanging out like whoa
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
