billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
he was CRYING into my vagina
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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