Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
