and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
